Sunday, March 29, 2009

Ride to the Grocery Store...by Soccer Mom

I wish I could have recorded this. Me and the munchkins were on our way to Whole Foods - a 20 minute drive. Mind you, we have the DVD player in the backseat but it didn't seem to make a difference.

Jacob: Are we there yet?

Mom: No Jacob. We just left the house. It will be about 20 minutes.

Jacob: That's going to take an hour!

Mom: No Jacob, it'll only take 20 minutes.

Jacob: It'll be one hundred minutes.

Mom: No Jacob, just 20 minutes. Why don't you watch the movie?

Kaitrin: A, B, C, D, E....Momma, I a good singer.

Mom: Yes Kaitrin, you are a good singer.

Kaitrin: I sing more, A, B, C, D...

Jacob: Kaitrin! Stop - you are giving me a headache!

Kaitrin: No Jacob! I a good singer! (singing louder) A, B, C, D, E...

Mom: Jacob, let her sing...put your head phones on and watch the movie.

Jacob: Mom, what's that?

Mom: It's the Budwieser Plant

Jacob: Do they make Bud?

Mom: They make beer - not bud.

Kaitrin: Deer!

Mom: No Kaitrin, Beer not Deer.

Jacob: Uncle Michael likes to drink beer.

Kaitrin: Uncle Michael likes deer.

Mom: No Kaitrin, Uncle Michael likes beer.

Kaitrin: White Tailed Deer!

Jacob: She doesn't know anything, Mom

Mom: Jacob, she's learning. Leave her alone.

Kaitrin: Sunday, Monday, Tuesday...

Jacob: Kaitrin! Stop singing!

Kaitrin: Jacob, I smack you butt.

Mom: Kaitrin, hitting isn't nice.

Kaitrin: It funny momma, it funny. Hee hee hee

Jacob: What's that over there?

Kaitrin: What's that?

Jacob: It looks like a tower.

Kaitrin: A tower!

Jacob: Kaitrin! Stop repeating me!

Kaitrin: Repeat me

Jacob: Mommy! Make her stop!

Kaitrin: Make her stop...I smack you butt!

Mom: There is a movie on...someone please watch it....

Jacob: Are we there yet?

Mom: It'll be just a minute Jacob.

Kaitrin: I want a cookie!

Mom: We can buy some at the store Kaitrin.

Jacob: Mommy, I was watching the clock and your minute is up. We aren't at the store. What's up with that?

Mom: We will be there soon. If we go to the right here, it takes us to the zoo.

Kaitrin: The zooooooo! I want go to Zooooo! Zooooo! Zooooo!

Mom: When it gets warmer, Kaitrin.

Kaitrin: Now! Zoo! Please Momma!

Mom: When it gets warmer...it's too cold today.

Jacob: Maybe we can go in May. I don't think I remember any of the zoo animals Mom.

Mom: They are all the same Jacob, you haven't missed anything since the last time we were there.

Kaitrin: Animals! I see animals!

Mom: Maybe tomorrow Kaitrin.

Jacob: But I have school tomorrow!

Mom: I was just saying Jacob. What do you want to buy at the store?

Jacob: Mango

Kaitrin: Gango! Yucky...disgusting!

Jacob: Na-ah Kaitrin - it's good.

Kaitrin: No Jacob! I smack you butt!

Mom: Where did you learn that Kaitrin?

Kaitrin: Jacob say it.

Mom: Thanks Jacob...

Mom: We are here! Everyone out!

Kaitrin: Get out pokey butt...let's go, now!

Mom: Settle down little Miss Bossy...

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